the best summer ever; because of you.
My first summer with you, was also the best.
For I learnt how to love, and how love feels like.
I had my first kiss, my first touch, my first hugs.
I learnt that to love someone, you learn to let them go.
I learnt that to love someone, you learn to let yourself go too; for them.
whispers of summer
her story
friends
birdsongs
memories
sunrays
sometimes what i want to say isn't apparent through what you just see(:
Saturday, November 29, 2008
to beijing! :D
to beijing! :Dhaha yep i'll be off to beijing for a week from tmr until next sunday! meanwhile i just checked the weather report for beijing for the next 5 days, and it got my brothers and i jumping like mad xD xD here it is:
a) the temperature! thursday's and friday's ftw! ahaha i've never been to such a cold country before - the temperature's definitely sub-zero for both days xD [and neither have my brothers, so we're all really excited.] b) chance of snow on wednesday night! :D wheeeeeee. who cares if beijing's snow is grey because of the pollution; it's still snow! okay i should really be going now, because i still have some last-minute packing to do and i'm only on the computer because i was supposed to check the weather forecast and clear my cam's memory, but i was so excited i just had to post this xD so it's sayonara until next sunday then; meanwhile, take care, God bless! [and don't miss me too much! ahaha xD] 9:38 pm
Friday, November 28, 2008
maybes and what-ifs.
maybes and what-ifs.maybe i should be obsessing less over my emo songs. but what if the reason for that was because they speak my thoughts? maybe life's never meant to be a fairy tale. but what if through the tears and the heartaches, we make our own fairy tale? maybe things were meant to turn out this way. but what if things still can be changed? maybe good times were never meant to last forever. but what if having those memories was enough? maybe memories were meant to be just memories. but what if we treasured those memories and let them live forever in our hearts? maybe people were just meant to grow further and further apart with time. but what if there's always a reason for that happening, and all you have to do is to find that reason and reverse it? maybe things just hardly ever go the way i want them to go. but what if i just have to work at making my dreams come true? maybe she wasn't meant to have him anyway, because he was such an angel God had to take him away from her. but what if she can't carry on without him? maybe love just wasn't meant for them. but what if it was; all they have to do is to give it another chance? maybe i should just be happy that i once had what i used to have instead of crying over its loss.
but what if it just took a little more effort to get it back?
maybe it wouldn't matter what i did, because it wouldn't make a difference anymore. but what if it would; how'd i know it wouldn't make a difference? maybe somewhere along the line, i made a mistake.
but what if i had a chance to make things right again?
maybe you wouldn't give me that chance anymore.
but what if you, or someone else, would? 5:37 pm
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
just a random thought.
just a random thought.maybe it's just me, but don't you think it's kinda sad how you can sign in to msn and see all the poeple who are online, but never talk to them at all? or even better/worse, haven't talked to them in eternity even if you've always noticed they're online? it may be just anyone - ex-classmates [from primary sch/sec sch/third lang/tuition/whatever]; friends from elsewhere [church, etc?] - but what i thought was lamentable was the fact that you were once friends that talked to each other on a regular basis, or even maybe friends so close that you'd be on msn every day just to talk to each other/sms every single free minute of the day when you couldn't be on msn, but now there just doesn't seem to be anything to talk about between you. it's practically like, i know you're online; you know i'm online, but all we do is just go back to life without even saying hi. and that makes me wonder: just what on earth happened? then, at this point in time, i can't help but think back on the times we used to have. and so here am i, just thinking - do you still think of me these few days? because i just did. so how's life been?because i've been missing you. insanely.
i pined for you so much today i cried again.and i wish you'd believe this; ily. 6:50 pm
Monday, November 24, 2008
sure feels like something's missing..
sure feels like something's missing.."and the days feel like years when i'm alone...when you walk away i count the steps that you take;do you see how much i need you right now?when you're gone,the pieces of my heart are missing you.when you're gone,the face i came to know is missing too.when you're gone ,the words i need to hear to always get me through the dayand make it okay - i miss you.i've never felt this way beforeeverything that i do reminds me of you."i miss my ICYL group. and all the friends i've made throughout those 5 days. if only we had more than just 5 days; if only we could have had more time together.if only.but i guess part of what makes me cherish all of them even more is the fact that i'll probably never see them for a very very very long time, if at all. especially the indians/vietnamese, ghea, who's indonesian, and winnie, who's from hong kong. [speaking of winnie she's really cute, you should have seen how big her eyes were when she saw i was reading 'the thirteenth tale' by diane setterfield in the taiwanese fan2 ti3 edition xD i quote: 'whoaa you can read traditional chinese too? i can't read simplified!']honestly, absence makes the heart grow fonder. then again, i'm glad we had what we had; thanks for all the great times and memories i'll never forget.love you guys; amanda. zan. saanya. faaiza. shagun. thu. nga. trang. linh. aisyah. sarah. atiqa. shinyi. and pristine. jetaime. eugenia. tessa. jocelyn. kristin. winnie. aiza. rahmah. and the other people in clark whom i went out with but whose names i can't rmb ><
miss you too.
[and i'm always saying 'love you; miss you' to someone else too, but oh well ><] 7:53 pm
Friday, November 14, 2008
FAM! [and farewells.]
FAM! [and farewells.]this post shall be dedicated to FAM'08 :D [and it's partly because this is my 100th post and it deserves to go to something important xD] okay i predict i'll end up rambling towards the end, but whatever. well fam was supposed to start at 6, so i was going to shinyi's house to prepare/change/slack/help her with her stuff/whatever at 3 or so. then i got an sms saying that i could get my phone back [cuz i sent it for repair the day before] so i detoured to wisma. ended up reaching shinyi's at 4 >< on top of that i still had to finish attaching the chain to my necklace/make the crystal chain for my hairclip, so i think we actually got started on fam preparations/changing/etc at uh..5? yiting came at around that time, but we ended up taking a horribly long time to change and all she decided to walk over to jingxiao's and hitch a ride with her instead. and after we changed, there were still a gazillion things to do - make-up/hair, for example. and when we finished, we realised it was already 6.25 or so. gasp. after some frenzied rushing about tying shawls and etc, we chionged all the way to marriott; reached there at 6.45, then realised that we were actl quite early. as shinyi's mum said, 'aiya they put 6.00pm on the ticket knowing that you girls will be late and arrive at 7 anyway so since dinner will start at 7, they put 6. smart.' so since we were actl earlier than quite a few people, the phototaking frenzy started! xD it's at this time that i wish my mum had bought a camera earlierrrr zomg my phone camera isn't the best of things to take pictures with in red lighting/when the photographer you hijacked is laden with a few requests to take pictures for other people and shifts the camera before the silly slow phone can save it, which results in very blurred pictures. oh well. not forgetting that my phone cam can't zoom arghh. terrible. but on the other hand, the food was quite good, honestly. and the performances ahaha! rj street dance owns. and the miss FAM pageant! comic entertainment. but the nominees' performances<3! haha.
after the food, it was picture time again! year pic/class pic/pics with friends i found while going through the room trying to get pics with teachers. and mr yeoh's camera didn't take our picture, it died just before the shutter snapped. so i don't have my picture with him and shinyi after all ): oh well. at least we had one with ms koh and ms tan. and i wanted one with mrs hoo, but somehow she wasn't anywhere to be found.
that reminds me - photos on facebook! http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=42145&l=9dce4&id=836133356 :D :D
and people who took pictures with me/of me/those that i hijacked cameras from but haven't sent me their pictures send me please! :D oh haha and i want my picture with xinxuan too xD but i don't know if she'll send it to me. oh well.
then again, who we had pictures of doesn't really matter; what matters is that the memories of being with those that had walked with us through our rgs life remain with us as long as we live. because ultimately, the thing i miss most about rg isn't the building itself [although i do miss it, a little] but rather, it's the people that have, one way or other, made a difference in my life.
four years. from the 'scruffy little girls' to the 'bright and talented young ladies and leaders of tomorrow', we've sure come a long way. we've all grown, some way or other. and everyone around us has seen us mature and [to quote mr yeoh] blossom into who we are today. so many of us with leadership posts, the pillars holding up our respective ccas' excos, classes, houses, leadership boards etc. but who knew, four years ago, that we'd come so far? i'd never have guessed, honestly. i'd never have thought i could be where i am today.
and so, to everyone that has made a difference in my rg life - teachers/friends/seniors/juniors/other people like the non-teaching staff [as mrs hoo likes to say, 'never forget the hardworking green man who keeps your school clean all the time!' and the librarians who suddenly said 'good luck and all the best to you, my dear!' to me on the last day of sch when they realised i was a secfour and i was leaving the school forever] - thankyou. maybe you didn't realise it, but what you did may have changed my life forever. God bless. <3. 6:50 pm
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
indecision.
indecision.is it better to try and get everything you wanted and risk failing, or is it better to settle for something less but that which you already have? that's what i keep asking myself nowadays. thing is, i can't decide. it's not that the latter isn't enough - it's actually more than i could ask for, but it's just not everything, or close to everything, that i want. and i can't make up my mind whether being content but not perrrfectly content, or trying to get as close to perfection as you can but risking everything you have is better.yiting says i should just wait until i've decided. maybe that's what i should do. although not everyone may want to wait as long as i'm willing to. i have no idea.but really, i'm getting more and more convinced that i should just be happy with what i have and stop chasing [possibly impossible] dreams. my perfectionist stance is somewhat wavering. [yeahyeah maybe you're winning me over. a little by a little.]i don't know, honestly. i can't decide. still. God help me. 7:42 pm
Monday, November 03, 2008
so long, farewell; it's time to say goodbye.
so long, farewell; it's time to say goodbye.four years. 说长不长，说短却又不短。sure, i've got my fair share of good memories and bad times, but it's the memories i'll always treasure. i'll really miss the times we had, but i'll miss the people i've come to love even more. it's a pity this had to end, that it won't last forever.可是在今天做的一篇综合填空里看到这么一句话 --- 一件事情的结束，永远是另一件事情的开启。
i'm looking forward to next year too, though. for various reasons. for one, better canteen/food! xD for another, to quote daniel, half the nyps gep batch is in raffles :D 人有悲欢离合，月有阴晴圆缺。有些人只不过和我们在人生道路上轻轻插肩而过，但也有些人和我们共同走了一段时间，难免地，会影响到彼此。或许也会在彼此的记忆、人生中留下了深深的印象。i can't help but wonder, just how much of a difference have i made these past four years?但是最终，不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有。
[photos of farewell another time, soon. i promise. i'm tired out after so much chinese already.] 7:39 pm
Saturday, November 29, 2008
to beijing! :D to beijing! :Dhaha yep i'll be off to beijing for a week from tmr until next sunday! meanwhile i just checked the weather report for beijing for the next 5 days, and it got my brothers and i jumping like mad xD xD here it is:
a) the temperature! thursday's and friday's ftw! ahaha i've never been to such a cold country before - the temperature's definitely sub-zero for both days xD [and neither have my brothers, so we're all really excited.] b) chance of snow on wednesday night! :D wheeeeeee. who cares if beijing's snow is grey because of the pollution; it's still snow! okay i should really be going now, because i still have some last-minute packing to do and i'm only on the computer because i was supposed to check the weather forecast and clear my cam's memory, but i was so excited i just had to post this xD so it's sayonara until next sunday then; meanwhile, take care, God bless! [and don't miss me too much! ahaha xD]
Friday, November 28, 2008
maybes and what-ifs. maybes and what-ifs.maybe i should be obsessing less over my emo songs. but what if the reason for that was because they speak my thoughts? maybe life's never meant to be a fairy tale. but what if through the tears and the heartaches, we make our own fairy tale? maybe things were meant to turn out this way. but what if things still can be changed? maybe good times were never meant to last forever. but what if having those memories was enough? maybe memories were meant to be just memories. but what if we treasured those memories and let them live forever in our hearts? maybe people were just meant to grow further and further apart with time. but what if there's always a reason for that happening, and all you have to do is to find that reason and reverse it? maybe things just hardly ever go the way i want them to go. but what if i just have to work at making my dreams come true? maybe she wasn't meant to have him anyway, because he was such an angel God had to take him away from her. but what if she can't carry on without him? maybe love just wasn't meant for them. but what if it was; all they have to do is to give it another chance? maybe i should just be happy that i once had what i used to have instead of crying over its loss.
but what if it just took a little more effort to get it back?
maybe it wouldn't matter what i did, because it wouldn't make a difference anymore. but what if it would; how'd i know it wouldn't make a difference? maybe somewhere along the line, i made a mistake.
but what if i had a chance to make things right again?
maybe you wouldn't give me that chance anymore.
but what if you, or someone else, would?
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
just a random thought. just a random thought.maybe it's just me, but don't you think it's kinda sad how you can sign in to msn and see all the poeple who are online, but never talk to them at all? or even better/worse, haven't talked to them in eternity even if you've always noticed they're online? it may be just anyone - ex-classmates [from primary sch/sec sch/third lang/tuition/whatever]; friends from elsewhere [church, etc?] - but what i thought was lamentable was the fact that you were once friends that talked to each other on a regular basis, or even maybe friends so close that you'd be on msn every day just to talk to each other/sms every single free minute of the day when you couldn't be on msn, but now there just doesn't seem to be anything to talk about between you. it's practically like, i know you're online; you know i'm online, but all we do is just go back to life without even saying hi. and that makes me wonder: just what on earth happened? then, at this point in time, i can't help but think back on the times we used to have. and so here am i, just thinking - do you still think of me these few days? because i just did. so how's life been?because i've been missing you. insanely.
i pined for you so much today i cried again.and i wish you'd believe this; ily.
Monday, November 24, 2008
sure feels like something's missing.. sure feels like something's missing.."and the days feel like years when i'm alone...when you walk away i count the steps that you take;do you see how much i need you right now?when you're gone,the pieces of my heart are missing you.when you're gone,the face i came to know is missing too.when you're gone ,the words i need to hear to always get me through the dayand make it okay - i miss you.i've never felt this way beforeeverything that i do reminds me of you."i miss my ICYL group. and all the friends i've made throughout those 5 days. if only we had more than just 5 days; if only we could have had more time together.if only.but i guess part of what makes me cherish all of them even more is the fact that i'll probably never see them for a very very very long time, if at all. especially the indians/vietnamese, ghea, who's indonesian, and winnie, who's from hong kong. [speaking of winnie she's really cute, you should have seen how big her eyes were when she saw i was reading 'the thirteenth tale' by diane setterfield in the taiwanese fan2 ti3 edition xD i quote: 'whoaa you can read traditional chinese too? i can't read simplified!']honestly, absence makes the heart grow fonder. then again, i'm glad we had what we had; thanks for all the great times and memories i'll never forget.love you guys; amanda. zan. saanya. faaiza. shagun. thu. nga. trang. linh. aisyah. sarah. atiqa. shinyi. and pristine. jetaime. eugenia. tessa. jocelyn. kristin. winnie. aiza. rahmah. and the other people in clark whom i went out with but whose names i can't rmb ><
miss you too.
[and i'm always saying 'love you; miss you' to someone else too, but oh well ><]
Friday, November 14, 2008
FAM! [and farewells.] FAM! [and farewells.]this post shall be dedicated to FAM'08 :D [and it's partly because this is my 100th post and it deserves to go to something important xD] okay i predict i'll end up rambling towards the end, but whatever. well fam was supposed to start at 6, so i was going to shinyi's house to prepare/change/slack/help her with her stuff/whatever at 3 or so. then i got an sms saying that i could get my phone back [cuz i sent it for repair the day before] so i detoured to wisma. ended up reaching shinyi's at 4 >< on top of that i still had to finish attaching the chain to my necklace/make the crystal chain for my hairclip, so i think we actually got started on fam preparations/changing/etc at uh..5? yiting came at around that time, but we ended up taking a horribly long time to change and all she decided to walk over to jingxiao's and hitch a ride with her instead. and after we changed, there were still a gazillion things to do - make-up/hair, for example. and when we finished, we realised it was already 6.25 or so. gasp. after some frenzied rushing about tying shawls and etc, we chionged all the way to marriott; reached there at 6.45, then realised that we were actl quite early. as shinyi's mum said, 'aiya they put 6.00pm on the ticket knowing that you girls will be late and arrive at 7 anyway so since dinner will start at 7, they put 6. smart.' so since we were actl earlier than quite a few people, the phototaking frenzy started! xD it's at this time that i wish my mum had bought a camera earlierrrr zomg my phone camera isn't the best of things to take pictures with in red lighting/when the photographer you hijacked is laden with a few requests to take pictures for other people and shifts the camera before the silly slow phone can save it, which results in very blurred pictures. oh well. not forgetting that my phone cam can't zoom arghh. terrible. but on the other hand, the food was quite good, honestly. and the performances ahaha! rj street dance owns. and the miss FAM pageant! comic entertainment. but the nominees' performances<3! haha.
after the food, it was picture time again! year pic/class pic/pics with friends i found while going through the room trying to get pics with teachers. and mr yeoh's camera didn't take our picture, it died just before the shutter snapped. so i don't have my picture with him and shinyi after all ): oh well. at least we had one with ms koh and ms tan. and i wanted one with mrs hoo, but somehow she wasn't anywhere to be found.
that reminds me - photos on facebook! http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=42145&l=9dce4&id=836133356 :D :D
and people who took pictures with me/of me/those that i hijacked cameras from but haven't sent me their pictures send me please! :D oh haha and i want my picture with xinxuan too xD but i don't know if she'll send it to me. oh well.
then again, who we had pictures of doesn't really matter; what matters is that the memories of being with those that had walked with us through our rgs life remain with us as long as we live. because ultimately, the thing i miss most about rg isn't the building itself [although i do miss it, a little] but rather, it's the people that have, one way or other, made a difference in my life.
four years. from the 'scruffy little girls' to the 'bright and talented young ladies and leaders of tomorrow', we've sure come a long way. we've all grown, some way or other. and everyone around us has seen us mature and [to quote mr yeoh] blossom into who we are today. so many of us with leadership posts, the pillars holding up our respective ccas' excos, classes, houses, leadership boards etc. but who knew, four years ago, that we'd come so far? i'd never have guessed, honestly. i'd never have thought i could be where i am today.
and so, to everyone that has made a difference in my rg life - teachers/friends/seniors/juniors/other people like the non-teaching staff [as mrs hoo likes to say, 'never forget the hardworking green man who keeps your school clean all the time!' and the librarians who suddenly said 'good luck and all the best to you, my dear!' to me on the last day of sch when they realised i was a secfour and i was leaving the school forever] - thankyou. maybe you didn't realise it, but what you did may have changed my life forever. God bless. <3.
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
indecision. indecision.is it better to try and get everything you wanted and risk failing, or is it better to settle for something less but that which you already have? that's what i keep asking myself nowadays. thing is, i can't decide. it's not that the latter isn't enough - it's actually more than i could ask for, but it's just not everything, or close to everything, that i want. and i can't make up my mind whether being content but not perrrfectly content, or trying to get as close to perfection as you can but risking everything you have is better.yiting says i should just wait until i've decided. maybe that's what i should do. although not everyone may want to wait as long as i'm willing to. i have no idea.but really, i'm getting more and more convinced that i should just be happy with what i have and stop chasing [possibly impossible] dreams. my perfectionist stance is somewhat wavering. [yeahyeah maybe you're winning me over. a little by a little.]i don't know, honestly. i can't decide. still. God help me.
Monday, November 03, 2008
so long, farewell; it's time to say goodbye. so long, farewell; it's time to say goodbye.four years. 说长不长，说短却又不短。sure, i've got my fair share of good memories and bad times, but it's the memories i'll always treasure. i'll really miss the times we had, but i'll miss the people i've come to love even more. it's a pity this had to end, that it won't last forever.可是在今天做的一篇综合填空里看到这么一句话 --- 一件事情的结束，永远是另一件事情的开启。
i'm looking forward to next year too, though. for various reasons. for one, better canteen/food! xD for another, to quote daniel, half the nyps gep batch is in raffles :D 人有悲欢离合，月有阴晴圆缺。有些人只不过和我们在人生道路上轻轻插肩而过，但也有些人和我们共同走了一段时间，难免地，会影响到彼此。或许也会在彼此的记忆、人生中留下了深深的印象。i can't help but wonder, just how much of a difference have i made these past four years?但是最终，不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有。
[photos of farewell another time, soon. i promise. i'm tired out after so much chinese already.]
i'm just the girl in the corner, the girl with the wistful eyes;
jiaying
seventeen! but that'll change on 220910 xD
rafflesian
113'05, 210'06, 315'07, 415'08 10S03P!
redcrosser passed out;
tribunist [vchair yay :D] said farewell;
but i'll never forget those days(:
archer! :D
still a writer, yep.
save me...
absolutely deranged
chocoholic
shopaholic
complete psychotic
stress-hater
panicky [i'm serious.]
unfortunately, more often than not, a broken rose.
... before i drive myself mad.
je t'aime;
rgsrcy
tribune
rj archery!
writers' guild!
reading! xD
dancing <3!
singing
going on facebook and playing random games there HAHA
grand pianos [oh, nothing beats a grand!]
black; pink; chocolate brown :D
astronomy; knitting; archeryyy(:
pool; bridge; mahjong! xD
chemistry! [favourite subject (:]
needless to say, we must never leave out the two essences of life, chocolate and shopping! i can never do without
them hahaha(x
for all life is a dream, and dreams themselves are only dreams;
ra science nahh no chance alr. but nevermind(:
>3.6 gpa [HAHA YES I DID IT FOR SECTHREE!(:]
tribune chair vchair's good enough. and in any case, my term's over anyway.
>3.6 SECFOUR gpa! YES I DID IT AGAIN! :D
rj chem ra! thank God i got in! :D
or uwc nordic! didn't apply; decided that specialising in sciences was the wiser choice, given my inaptitude
for humanities ><
rj dance! street/intl also can :D :Dbut nevermind, because rj archery pwns all now!
not forgetting the typical wish for world peace, duh. (:
and i wish i could have him. or at least, if we're not meant to be, someone to love
and to love me back. &it's true that love ends up being a battlefield sometimes, but it's still love; blessed
love.
for we were meant to last forever;
i find my paradise when you look me in the eyes-
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